A Certain Absolutely Lovely City
by hiss13
Summary: As part of an infiltration and investigation mission, "The Children" transfer into Tokiwadai Middle School. Here in this crazy city, they soon meet a certain unlucky illusion killer. Cue the property damage and a whole lot of Fukou Da.
1. Inanity 01

Inanity 01-

Welcome to the City of Science.  
Infiltration_Mission.

**B.A.B.E.L. Headquarters-Chief's Office**

It was a mild Autumn Day on September 20th. Three twelve year old girls were gathered at the headquarters of B.A.B.E.L., also known as the Base Backing ESP Laboratory, in front of their large and burly commander, Kiritsubo Taizou. These girls were the elite ESPers of Japan, the three Level 7s known as "The Children". These three girls were Sannomiya Shiho, Nogami Aoi, and Akashi Kaoru. Standing behind them was a man, named Minamoto Koichi, of normal build in a black suit with black hair and glasses.

"I'll just get straight to business, girls." Minamoto started. "Within the next week, you will be transferring out of your current school."

"What the hell is with this!?" Kaoru, a girl with shoulder length red hair and red eyes, screamed in surprise.

"Minamoto-han, I think we all deserve an explanation here." Aoi, the girl with waist length black hair and blue eyes, demanded.

The third girl, Sannomiya Shiho, a girl with shoulder length silver hair and purple eyes, remained surprisingly silent. However, there was an obvious expression of discontent molded onto her face as a result of the announcement.

"I would have given you an explanation had you not interrupted me." Minamoto replied calmly. Three years of babysitting "The Children" had left him somewhat hardened to their antics and outbursts. That being said, he still wasn't perfect when it came to dealing with them. "We are deploying you for a new mission. Unlike previous missions, however, this one will be a long-term investigation. I'm sure you've heard of Academy City, right?"

"The Western Bloc of Tokyo that is its own independent city-state, right?" Shiho replied.

"You mean the place where that Daihaseisai is taking place?" Kaoru asked with a highly eager expression.

"Exactly. Academy City consists of over 2 million residents and a good 80% of those residents are students. A majority of these students undergo some sort of ESPer development program including the normals." Minamoto continued. "These ESPers are ranked by a different standard than the commonly accepted international standard. Rather than the 1-7 scale normally used, they use a 0-5 scale. Within Academy City, only seven ESPers claim the title of Level 5.

"The remaining residents are teachers, professors, doctors, and, most importantly, researchers. At the same time, Academy City has connections to a large number of cooperative institutions. Due to these researchers, Academy City is believed to be thirty years ahead of the rest of the world when it comes to technology and scientific discovery. This is what leads into the issue at hand.

"We have reason to believe that scientists in Academy City are performing large amounts of human research that violates international law and bioethics standards."

"So, we're supposed to infiltrate and investigate Academy City to find definite evidence of this supposed 'violation'." An annoyed Shiho attempted to finish Minamoto's statement.

"What!? Is that true, Minamoto-han!?" Aoi exclaimed in surprise.

"In essence, yes," Kiritsubo spoke up. "As insinuated, we do not have any hard evidence. However, we do have backings in the form of predictions. While many countries including our own have ignored this issue due to alliances with Academy City, B.A.B.E.L. will be acting without any government backing for this mission."

"There is one other mission objective. Due to the ESPer development within the city's borders, we feel that P.A.N.D.R.A. may attempt something. As such, we feel that it would be best to send the three of you.

"There is one anomaly that we had when planning this mission, however. When the effective change level of this mission was calculated, we received '∞'."

* * *

**Tokiwadai Middle School**

It was September 28th. The culmination of the Daihaseisai had passed three days ago. As such, the students were back to school again.

Shirai Kuroko sat at her desk while awaiting morning homeroom. She was in a very sour mood. The day before, she was taken off of her wheelchair since her injuries inflicted by Musujime Awaki on September 14th had recovered to the point where she could stand and walk on her own. Under normal circumstances, one would be happy about this kind of development. Being able to walk freely is something a lot of people would kill for. However, Kuroko was…different.

To her, being confined to a wheel chair meant that her beloved onee-sama, the unrivaled electric princess and the Ace of Tokiwadai, Misaka Mikoto, would not be as rough with her and would help take care of her. At the same time, more of Mikoto's attention would be placed onto her rather than that troglodyte, Kamijou Touma. To a girl like Kuroko, this period of injury was the ultimate bliss. Sadly, however, that bliss was never meant to be eternal.

As such, her days went back to what they used to be. In the end, getting the attention of her onee-sama once again became something she would have to work for.

In the end, September 28th would be like every other day- just a normal day in the life of Judgment Officer Shirai Kuroko at the 177th Branch. Well, that's what she thought.

The homeroom teacher whose name nobody bothered to remember entered the room. "Alright, today we will be having some new faces joining us."

The class went into a minor clamor over hearing this. Kuroko was genuinely surprised at the current turn of events. Transfer students were rare. The idea of a student transferring into Tokiwadai was almost ridiculous to most people considering that the students who entered had to be at least Level 3 ESPers. Yet, it was happening. What was weirder was that the words the nameless teacher spoke implied that there was more than one. It seemed like the kind of overused ploy that and inexperienced author would use to force characters to meet.

Kuroko rubbed her temples while trying to fathom how ridiculous this kind of event was.

"Alright, girls. Come on in."

With that announcement, three girls walked in. On the right was a silver haired girl. On the right was a black-haired girl. In the middle was a redhead.

"Now introduce yourselves."

"Sannomiya Shiho, Level 4 Psychometer."

"Nogami Aoi, Level 4 Move Point."

"Akashi Kaoru, Level 4 General Psychokinetist."

Kuroko, being the clever Judgment member she was, decided to analyze the situation before making a single utterance.

"Are~?"

* * *

**A Certain High School**

"…And so, this man will be your newest teachers starting today." The pink-haired, chain-smoking, beer-chugging loli teacher concluded her introduction of the new teacher. Standing next to her was a man in a black suit and turquoise tie. "His name is Minamoto Kouichi. Please treat him kindly."

"I am pleased to meet you all. I hope we all get along."

A spikey-haired boy, named Kamijou Touma, sitting in the back corner next to the window stared blankly at the new teacher in surprise. Normally, every new person he met including his teachers had their own quirks and could be quite eccentric. However, the new teacher standing in front of him felt different. He actually felt…normal. He wasn't a ten year old genius mage or something along those lines. He was just a well-built intellectual.

Two days had passed since the incident with the _La Regina del Mare Adriatico_. After laying adrift in the warm waters of the Adriatic Sea for a short period, his doctor had immediately had him transported via supersonic jet to Academy City so that the frog-faced doctor could examine him directly. As a result, his Italian vacation had been cut short.

Touma walked into school that day after being bitten by Index as usual. In the end, every event in his life since he could remember was some sort of crazy incident involving crazed ESPers or magicians. Everyone he met seemed to have some dark secret, though. Hell, he wouldn't be surprised even if Aogami Pierce was the 6th Level 5 hiding from the public eye. However, for the first time, Kamijou Touma felt relief in that something normal had entered his life even in the smallest respect. For the first time in his life, he felt that he could avoid having to mutter "Fukou da."

Well…everyone has a lapse in judgment at one point or another.

* * *

**Hissy: Hello, all! This is my second story. Unlike my first story, this won't really have any underlying plot and will mainly be a comedy with a few dramatic developments. **

**Touma: Hey…uhm…that last sentence…**

**Hissy: What? You think you're gonna get off without a scratch? Think again, Touma. **

**Minamoto: I have an issue. You never took into account the fact that ESPer development has been happening in the ZKC-verse since at least World War II. **

**Hissy: Yeah…remember what Kuroko was thinking about when the transfer students for her class were announced…eheheh…**

**Minamoto: I think I'll just drop that subject. But, why would Academy City even find "The Children" to be interesting enough to transfer in?**

**Hissy: That is something I'll explain soon. Maybe in the next chapter…maybe… The hint is…SS2. **

**Well, Hyoubu Kyousuke will be entering the playing field soon and meeting with a certain Level 5.**

**Minamoto: Wait!? You're bringing HIM in!?**

**Hissy: Yeah…ZKC is no fun without our favorite troll. Hmm…I wonder if I could also bring Sakaki into this… **

**Anyways, on the next chapter, Touma gets off on the wrong foot with "The Children" and Mikoto facepalms.**

**Touma: Fukou da.**

**Hissy: That was fast…Look forward to it and remember to review.**


	2. Inanity 02

Inanity 02-

Running Amok.

Unlucky_Illusion_Killer.

**A Certain District 7 Hospital**

Yoshikawa Kikyou was, by nature, a woman of pragmatism. This nature was almost like breathing to her. As such, she disliked wasting resources and she liked keeping things in order despite the fact that her workspace was such a mess the last time she was there. As such she made decisions like giving the Sisters cheap underwear since that factor didn't affect the outcome of the Level 6 Shift Project or working multiple contingency plans when necessary. That being said, one would think that she would have some aptitude for acting as a guardian for two children.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY 'SHE DISAPPEARED'!?" A red-eyed, white-haired boy with a choker-style electrode screamed angrily. He leaned against his modernistic cane and pushed his palm onto his face in annoyance. He was Academy City's #1 Level 5, Accelerator.

"I mean, she just snuck out of the back door in pure boredom," Yoshikawa replied bluntly. "Did you expect Last Order to just sit still in a hospital room? I'm more surprised that she didn't attempt this earlier. She left a note stating explicitly what she did."

She handed a small memo in her hand to Accelerator.

_Misaka got bored sitting in the same old hospital all day, states Misaka as Misaka writes in a rush. Misaka will be sneaking out of the hospital and looking for something to do, concludes Misaka as Misaka puts down the pen and rushes off. _

"We're being discharged from the hospital after rehabilitation in two days," Accelerator took a step towards Yoshikawa. "Couldn't she just wait a bit longer before running around?"

"You know as well as I do that, despite the fact that she's the hub of the Misaka Network, she will, like anybody else, get bored of sitting in a hospital since the beginning of the month. Like I said, I'm more surprised that it took this long for her to do this."

"How…" Accelerator muttered. "Shouldn't some of the cameras have captured that damn brat on film?"

"She is still a clone of the Railgun with 63/10000 of her power. She could have easily pivoted cameras and created blind spots for her to escape through."

Accelerator rubbed his forehead in annoyance before Yoshikawa continued. "So, aren't you going to go after her, guardian?"

"Hey! Don't push the responsibility onto me!" Accelerator protested.

Yoshikawa gave him a stern look before he acquiesced and walked out of the hospital room.

_Maybe I should accept Aiho's offer._ Yoshikawa got up off of the chair and walked to a nearby phone to call a certain Anti-Skill officer. It was the most practical option open to her, after all.

* * *

**Tokiwadai Interior Dormitory**

"Welcome to the interior dormitory, you three," a girl with dark blue hair and dark blue eyes said as she gestured towards the large building they were walking towards. Her name was Awatsuki Maaya and she was a swimming club member who was a friend of Kuroko.

"The external design itself is very similar to the Exterior Dormitory outside of the School Garden, but the rules are less stringent here," another girl with wavy brown hair and blue eyes spoke in sequence with Maaya. Her name was Wannai Kinuho, another friend of Kuroko and a swimming club member who was often seen with Maaya. "For example, our friend, Kongou-san is allowed to keep her pet snake with her in her room and lives alone despite the fact that most rooms are doubles."

"School Garden…?" Kaoru muttered.

"Less stringent…?" Shiho tipped her head.

"No, I'm pretty sure those should not be the focus of your attention…" Aoi tried pointing out.

After entering through the main glass doors of the main entrance, they walked into a grand lobby for the dorm. As the three girls walked through the lobby, they marveled at the bright and simple design of the lobby.

"Ah…by the way, which room are you staying in?" Kinuho asked as they walked into the hallway.

Kaoru picked up a piece of paper from her pocket. "Uh...Room 108, I believe," she said while looking at her paper to confirm it.

"That's the room across ours that was merged with its adjacent room, 110, a couple months ago, right, Maaya?"

"I think so.." Maaya replied with an unsure tone. "I have one piece of advice. Once you guys settle into your room, you should probably go around and explore the School Garden a bit."

After the five girls reached Room 108, they said their goodbyes and separated before entering their respective rooms.

As they sat on their respective beds in their merged room, Kaoru asked, "You know, Shiho…you look like you're feeling quite uncomfortable. Is something wrong?

"You noticed, huh…"

"Well, we've been joined at the hip since we were kids," Aoi cut in. "It would be weird if we were unable to notice that."

"Ever since we came here, I have been occasionally having weird visions. The bloodied corpse of a girl wearing our school uniform lying in an alley. Children lying in capsules. A bored white-haired man suspended in a tube of liquid. That last one seemed to be the most common one. They don't occur all too commonly, but…they're still disconcerting. I feel like my psychometry is activating on contact with _something_. I just don't know what, though…"

"Do you think those visions could be related to our infiltration objective?" Aoi calmly assessed.

"I think so…but there is too little for me to fully make an assessment…"

A heavy silence emanated through the dorm room for a short time before Kaoru interrupted.

"Maybe we should just go exploring the area, then. We're not gonna get anywhere just sitting here."

"We might as well…" Shiho complied as they all got out to leave the dorm room.

* * *

**A Certain District 7 Multilevel Overpass**

One of the biggest landmarks of District 7 aside from its School Garden was the multilevel overpass which was used by a large number of the city's students. It functioned as a large bus roundabout as well as a shopping mall and sporting center. As such, it was a perfect meeting spot for the residents.

A lone and out of place nun in white carrying a calico cat was walking around this overpass looking for only one thing.

"I'm hungry…"

This nun was occasionally went grocery shopping with her retainer, Kamijou Touma, when he was at home. However, he was at school today. As such, he left her with 2000 yen for food. She had originally tried to go to the restaurants near Touma's dorm. However, her reputation in those parts as the "devourer" had led the storeowners to force her away. After about an hour of wandering around, she ended up coming across the multilevel overpass and ended up on the third floor after aimlessly walking through the complex network of roads.

"Where do you think I should go, Sphynx?" she asked while looking at the cat in her arms.

The cat, of course, replied in the only way it could. "Myaaa~" It was as if it was saying, "I am but a simple cat. I wouldn't know where to find your human food."

After wandering for a bit more time, the nun collided into someone and both people fell back.

"Daaaahhh! Watch where you're going! Screams Misaka as Misaka gets up to yell at you."

"I could say the same about you, kid!" The nun exclaimed while both of them got up and stared each other down.

"Watch who you are calling a kid, screams Misaka as Misaka points angrily. You're the same size as I am."

"Ha! Childishness doesn't stem from size bu—" The nun suddenly was cut off by a deep rumble coming from her stomach.

"You seem hungry, states Misaka as Misaka observes your behavior."

"Touma went to school and didn't cook lunch for me today. He left me with 2000 yen but all of the restaurants out there give too small portions and they kicked me out."

"How about we look for an all-you-can-eat buffet in the overpass, suggests Misaka as Misaka points at the entrance to the shopping center."

"What is this 'all-you-can-eat buffet' which you speak of, Misaka?"

"Misaka's name is Last Order, interjects Misaka as Misaka speaks with passion. And allow Misaka to show you, says Misaka as Misaka puffs out her chest with pride."

"Mine is Index. Index Librorum Prohibitorum."

At that moment, a new duo-

"Myaa~"

Trio…had entered the multilevel overpass to wreak…seek food.

* * *

**A Certain Level Zero's Dormitory Room**

"Fukou da…"

Those were the first words Kamijou Touma had said when he entered his room. He was feeling good about the day at the time. His new teacher was a surprisingly normal person and he was having a surprisingly incident free day. He was even starting to feel like the calm would continue.

_Touma…_

_ I got bored just sitting around and you left me no lunch. In order to avoid the worst possible scenario, starving until you make dinner, I have decided to take that money you left me to procure some food. I am also taking Sphynx with me. I await dinner._

_Yours truly,_

_Index_

"The food I left in the fridge was supposed to be lunch…not a mid-morning snack…and she took the money I left on the table…Fukou da…"

As such, Touma took the best possible course of action he could. Find Index. After wandering throughout the grocery stores and restaurants near his dorm, he eventually ended up standing in a familiar park with a certain broken vending machine.

At the vending machines, he saw three girls crowding around a single machine, a black-haired girl with glasses, a redhead, and a silver-haired girl all in Tokiwadai uniforms. Kamijou kept on walking all while he had this weird feeling that there was going to be some sort of encounter.

* * *

**A Park Vending Machine in District 7**

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE!?" Kaoru screamed as she slammed her palm onto the vending machine.

"Calm down, Kaoru," Aoi and Shiho were holding back the screaming redhead. "Yelling at the vending machine will _not_ bring the money back."

Kaoru, whose anger had hit the tipping point, was ready to amplify the gravity in the area of the vending machine before…

"You know that vending machine frequently eats money, right?" a voice had come from behind them. They turned around to see a spiky-haired high school boy a few feet behind them.

"TEN THOUSAND FREAKING YEN!" Kaoru screamed before unleashing the gravity magnification on the unsuspecting boy. In a panic, however, Aoi and Shiho attempted to restrain her only a second too late.

Surprisingly, though, the boy had lifted his right hand and remained completely unharmed. At that moment, a certain phrase was uttered from the mouth of that boy.

"Fukou da."

* * *

**The Same Park Vending Machine in District 7**

A girl in a Tokiwadai uniform and tea-colored hair walked into the park to witness a certain scene unfold.

"What is that idiot doing?"

* * *

**Faculty Office at A Certain High School**

"So what did you think about your first day teaching here, newbie?" A woman in a green sports jacket asked Minamoto as she took her seat next to him.

"Well, Komoe-sensei's homeroom class is quite the interesting bunch of people to say the least, Yomikawa-sensei," Minamoto attempted the best possible response he could think of on the fly.

"Aww, come on. No need for the formalities, Kouichi. Just call us by our first names, Aiho and Tsukuyomi." She gave him a nice slap to the man's back causing him to nearly fall of his chair.

"By the way, I noticed that you brought a birdhouse with you, Kouichi." Komoe pointed out. "Did you find a place to live that allows pets?"

"It was a bit last minute but yes." Minamoto stated. "I found a place that allows me to keep pets with me."

As a bird highly embellished feathers walked out of the birdhouse, Minamoto put out his finger for it to perch on. "Meet Feather."

* * *

**Within the Windowless Building**

"Are you sure about letting those three ESPers from that Japanese agency into Academy City, Aleister?" A blonde-haired man in a school uniform, sunglasses, and a gold chain asked to the man in the tube of red liquid. "Doesn't the possibility of them being spies exist."

"If such a risk bothered me, they wouldn't have been allowed into the city," Aleister calmly replied. "Should they eventually prove to be a threat, I will see to it that any threat they pose is removed without damaging our foreign relations with Japan. Now then, I suggest that you take your leave with the guide."

* * *

**Omake-The Great Space Elevator of Retcon**

Five girls were walking through the School Garden while heading to the interior dormitory.

"Awatsuki-san, I have one question." Aoi stopped the group to point at something. "I may be hallucinating here, but…has that giant structure always been there?"

"Now that you mention it…" Kaoru turned to look around.

"You're overreacting, girls," Maaya interrupted. "Endymion has been there for at least three years. The construction was done in secrecy and in only a few years. I'm pretty sure that its existence was even officially announced shortly before it opened."

"That may be so, but…" Shiho rebutted. "I don't remember it being there when we were processing the transfer documents or even a couple of hours ago before we introduced ourselves to the class…I'm sure that we would notice something of that size earlier…"

"Maybe you just didn't pay attention to it when you saw it," Kinuho retorted. "It's not like it's something that can be built in a few hours exactly."

"I don't know…" Shiho pondered. "It still seems somewhat out of place to me. Almost as if it was just suddenly placed there just to serve some sort of plot need…"

"Ah…" Kaoru gasped. "Isn't that called a ret—"

"You guys just didn't notice it." Maaya interrupted with a smile. "That is all."

"Ok…but it—"

"You _just didn't notice it_." Kinuho stated while placing a bit more emphasis. "There's nothing more to that."

As that thread of conversation ended, they just continued walking. As that thread of conversation ended, Endymion loomed over Academy City with its questionable state of existence."

* * *

**Hissy: That wraps up Chapter 2. I'd call that an average day in the life of Kamijou Touma.**

**Mikoto: So why is it that even the nun gets more lines than I do?**

**Hissy: Ehh...for plot...um...convenience...?**

**Mikoto: *biri biri***

**Kaoru: Why is Feather here?**

**Hissy: Dammit...the worst possible people to be cornered by...I plan to have her play a role later on...so, I felt like it would be better to introduce her here before she became like Endymion...**

**Kaoru: *clenches fists***

**Hissy: Yeep! Anyways, there will be no pairings in this ****fic. Personally, I think that I'll just open up an annoying can of worms if I do. Also, with regards to the events that should occur on 0930, I originally was going to wing it but I was able to formulate some ideas. As such, I will be writing a 'Children Side' which will create some minor alterations to the main story. However, the events experienced by Touma and Accelerator on that day will be relatively the same as what was written in the novels and as such will not be touched upon except for certain parts. At the same time, some characters who didn't make any moves in that arc in the main story will be taking action including two Level 5s.**

**Kaoru and Mikoto: Excuse me! You still haven't—**

**Hissy: Well, till next time. Now, if you'll excuse me...*mad dashes for the door***

**Kaoru and Mikoto: Hey!**

* * *

**Update (April 2, 2013): I know that somebody is wondering how I came to making the Children Level 4's. I decided to start an appendix that is now written on my profile. It is incomplete as of now but I have put a reason why Aoi is a Level 4. **


	3. Inanity 03

Inanity 03-

Intersecting Paths.

Ace_and_The_Children.

**Eight Days Ago at B.A.B.E.L. Headquarters**

"Aside from the main investigation, there is one more issue that we do need to do a thorough investigation on in Academy City." Minamoto showed the three girls a picture of a spiky-haired high school boy. "His name is Kamijou Touma. From the information which we were able to attain, it seems that he is the head of a faction known as the 'Kamijou Faction' which is supposed to be as dangerous as both PANDRA and Black Phantom. As such, we need to keep its leader under observation and in check.

"This will be my objective in becoming a teacher at the school which he attends. In the meanwhile, your objective will be the investigation on the violations to international law made by Academy City. I will assist you guys in any way I can. However, I won't be able to make much contact with you three as a result…"

* * *

**A Park Vending Machine in District 7**

The spiky-haired boy named Kamijou Touma cautiously let his arm down as he watched "The Children" who were staring stunned at the events that just took place.

"Isn't that boy Minamoto-han's target?"

"He sure looks like the boy in Minamoto's photo…" Shiho muttered.

"More importantly, my attack suddenly fell apart," Kaoru noted. "According to what we know, he is only a Level Zero and it doesn't look like he's carrying any sort of ECM with him."

"I'll read him. Perhaps we can get some information about the faction this way." Shiho walked slowly towards the slightly dumbfounded Kamijou and grabbed at his right arm. To her surprise, however, she could read absolutely nothing. For the first time in her life, her psychometry was unable to pick up anything.

"Umm…"Kamijou stuttered for a second before speaking. "This is…really awkward." He looked into Shiho's eyes with an annoyed stare. "Would you mind letting go of me?"

Shiho tried to read him again to no avail. She was about to reach into her jacket to pull out her nanowire gun. However….

In a second, she felt Kamijou's left hand forcing her back and causing her to fall on the ground. As she fell back, she let go of Kamijou's hand, which he promptly raised in front of where Shiho's head was. What followed was a lightning spear coming from a few meters away hitting that hand and violently dissipating at contact.

"Y-Y-Y-Y-Y-Y-YOU!" A third angry voice chimed in. "I can't believe you, idiot! I turn my attention away from you for a bit and you're already flirting with my kouhai!" A girl with short tea-colored hair and flowery hairpins in a Tokiwadai Middle School winter uniform walked up with an irritated look in her face.

Once again, Kamijou uttered, "Fukou da….

"Look, they're the ones that were attacking the vending machine. I was just passing by and told them that the machine does not work and they went all ballistic-wait…." Kamijou stopped for a second.

"Why am I explaining this to you? ….and how exactly do you know they are your kouhai just because of the fact that they are wearing your school's uniform?"

"Well, Kuroko mentioned three transfer students entering her class and since I know almost all of the students in my school by face including my senpai, I assumed they were the transfer students considering that I have never seen them before."

"Oh…Kuroko…." Kamijou shuddered remembering the twin-tailed Misakasexual teleporter who seemed to be engaging in some sort of rivalry with him which he was unable to comprehend.

"Not to interrupt or anything," Kaoru said leading all eyes to turn towards her. "But who are you?" She bluntly asked pointing at Mikoto.

"She is Academy City's Number 3 Biribir—" Kamijou was interrupted by another lightning spear which he decided to dodge by stepping back rather than blocking.

"HOW. MANY. TIMES." Sparks gathered around her body and converged right next to her forehead. "DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU NOT TO CALL ME BY THAT NICKNAME! MY NAME IS MISAKA MIKOTO, DAMMIT!" The flustered girl began to let loose multiple lightning spears which arced and converged towards Kamijou.

However, the lightning spears were met by his right hand, which proceeded to shatter the spears. In that moment, Mikoto heard him mutter something.

"I really do not have the time for this."

Kaoru, Shiho, and Aoi stepped back and leaned against the vending machines as they watched the two bicker.

"Should we try and stop them?" Aoi tried suggesting.

"No…this is kinda fun to watch," Kaoru stated with a chuckle.

"Besides, I really do not like that guy." Shiho seemed to be exuding some negative vibes which Aoi and Kaoru easily picked up on. Perhaps it was the fact that she could not read him. Perhaps it was the fact that he seemed to be engaged in some weird romantic comedy like scenario. Perhaps it was his somewhat indifferent attitude. She had no idea what it was. But she was absolutely certain of one thing: the boy named Kamijou Touma pissed her off.

* * *

**Judgement 177****th**** Branch Office**

Saten Ruiko was bored. She normally would be having fun in town with Uiharu Kazari but she had to be at the Judgement Branch office and her friends were busy as well. As a result she ended up following Uiharu to her office and ran into their friend Shirai Kuroko, another Judgement officer, there.

"Three transfer students in Tokiwadai?" An astonished Saten gave a quizzical look at Shirai Kuroko, who had just mentioned them as she sat backwards on a swivel chair. "Isn't that extremely rare? I know that Kongou-san was the most recent one to transfer in, but the rumors are that it is even more difficult to get into Tokiwadai as a transfer student than it is as someone entering normally."

"I personally have never seen the entrance exams and such that prospective transfer students have had to take." Kuroko replied while filling out some regular reports. "However, it is a well known fact in Tokiwadai that the requirements for transfer students are incredibly more difficult to fulfill."

"Wow…" Uiharu elicited in surprise.

"Apparently, they were also friends with each other long before they even transferred in to Tokiwadai." Kuroko pointed out.

"Three transfers students into Tokiwadai and they were three close friends, huh…." Saten stared at the wall behind her view of Uiharu as she rested her head on the back of the chair. "Maybe they're spies sent by the Japanese government to do some sort of undercover investigation…."

"Now, now, Ruiko," Konori Mii interjected. "You can't just go and create some random and absurd idea just from a small coincidence. This is the kind of thing that starts those weird rumors."

"I know. I know. It's an _absurd_ idea, I get it. I won't spread any weird rumors. But I am sure that rumors about the new Tokiwadai transfers will be floating around soon. Just give it a few days."

"I would normally believe you and forget about it normally," Konori said as she glared at the girl in the swivel chair. "However, that obvious grin on your face is not really helping your case here."

* * *

**A Certain District 7 Multilevel Overpass**

Two girls were sitting across each other at a two-seater table by the window of a restaurant in the overpass mall called ominously called _Maou-sama's All-You-Can-Eat Buffet_. One of them was a silver-haired girl in a pure white nun's habit with a calico cat sticking its head out of the neck of her outfit. Her name was Index Librorum Prohibitorum. The other was a girl who looked approximately ten years of age with short tea-colored hair, a blue camisole, and an adult's dress shirt. Her name was Radio Noise Sister Serial No. 20001: Last Order.

"…and so, you pay the money up front and after you do so, you are allowed to take anything and any amount of food from the buffet area over there, says Misaka as Misaka points to the buffet area next to the wall with an air of intelligence."

Index gave Last Order a wide-eyed stare as she finished her explanation of the buffet. "THAT. IS. AMAZING! WHEN DO WE TAKE OUR FOOD?"

"Whoa! Misaka exclaims as Misaka sees the stars forming in your eyes! We take the food once we pay the 1000 yen in advance informs Misaka as Misaka takes out 1000 yen from her pocket."

"Well, what are we waiting for, then? Let's go get our food!" Index jumped out of the seat and grabbed Last Order as she made her way to the counter.

On that September 28th, another restaurant fell victim to the devourer of District 7.

* * *

**A Park Vending Machine in District 7**

Misaka Mikoto picked up a drink from the vending machine she had planted a well placed kicked to the side of. Twenty minutes had passed in the time that she had begun chasing Touma and in that time, he had, like usual, been able to escape from the angry Level 5.

"I guess a more proper introduction is in order as opposed to the one that idiot gave about me," stated Mikoto as she opened the pull-tab to her drink. "I am a second year at Tokiwadai."

"Akashi Kaoru. I'm a first year and a transfer student."

"Nogami Aoi. Also a first year."

"Sannomiya Shiho. The same."

"Akashi, huh…" Mikoto muttered. "Why does that name sound so familiar…?" She looked at Kaoru's face for a second. "Meh, whatever. So how was- "

She was promptly interrupted by the sound of Kaoru kicking the side of the vending machine at an angle while forcing her shin to collide with the corner accidentally. After failing to get a drink like Mikoto did, Kaoru pulled back her leg while clutching her shin. "I HATE VENDING MACHINES!"

"Yeah…that machine usually eats money from anyone who tries to use it," Mikoto explained while hiding a chuckle. "How much money did it eat?"

"….en-….nd yen…" Kaoru muttered.

"Huh?"

"Ten…thousand…yen…" Kaoru then hung her head in a depressed fashion.

"I…see…" Mikoto could sympathize with the three girls. After all, this vending machine, officially known as Vending Machine #7116, had taken the same amount when she was in her first year at Academy City. "Well…I might be able to get that money of yours back…"

Kaoru jumped up in front of Mikoto and took her hands with her own. "THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU-"

"Wait! I can try but in the end, the machine may dispense one hundred drinks instead. When I last tried this for someone else who lost two-thousand yen to this thing, he got twenty drinks, instead."

"Two-thousand yen? Those bills are still in circulation?"

"Well girls, what do you think?"

"Either way, we'll get something."

"We could always push the excess of drinks onto Minamoto-han if we end up with that."

Kaoru gave two thumbs up to Mikoto. "Go for it, senpai!"

"Alright." Mikoto put her palm next to the mouth for the money. "One more thing. Please don't refer to me as senpai." Mikoto turned her head back. "Just 'Misaka-san' works. Actually, that would probably be better considering how people refer to me."

"Is it like some shoujo manga-like scenario?" Shiho asked.

"That would be cute if it was only like that. You know how there are two Level 5s at Tokiwadai, right?"

"Yes…" The three girls nodded.

"…and you're one of them, right." Kaoru finished the sentence.

"Yes. The Number 5, Shoukohou-san, also known as Mental Out, is the leader of the largest faction [clique] in Tokiwadai and is most commonly known as the Queen of Tokiwadai while also being referred to as Shokuhou-sama, Queen-sama, my Queen, and others. I am as the Ace of Tokiwadai. However, I am usually referred to as…." She sighed for a second and looked around back and forth.

"Is something wrong, Misaka-han?"

"Ahh…sorry. It's just that the last time I made a similar line, my roommate suddenly teleported to the top of a nearby lamppost and interrupted. Anyways, they refer to me as…" Remembering the vending machine she pressed her hand against, she started to apply proper magnetic fluxes to it.

"….Misaka-sama, Misaka-senpai, Ace-sama, and other similar names…Honestly, it gets really annoying so getting referred to as Misaka-san is actually kinda refreshing, you see." At that moment, Vending Machine #7116 spit out the ten-thousand yen bill it had selfishly eaten earlier. "Ah…and there's your money."

She held the bill out towards the girls. "Maybe that idiot really was just unlucky," she muttered. She soon felt two hands clasp onto her once again.

"Thank you so much, Misaka-san!" Kaoru was once again clasped onto Mikoto's hands.

"Ah…you're welcome…"

As Kaoru let go of Mikoto's hands and Mikoto started taking another sip from her drink, Shiho decided to ask the one question that was weighing on their minds. "So, what is your relationship with that boy from earlier?"

Mikoto made a short spit-take before looking at the three with a bright red blush on her face. "What are you talking about? Relationship? That idiot is just…he…I…."

_Ohh? She looks like someone who would be fun to tease._ She noted this to herself as a mischievous smile appeared on her face.

Vending Machine #7116 was commonly on the receiving end of a large amount of abuse. However, it did have front row seats to some interesting events.

* * *

**In the Middle of the Pacific Ocean**

Sitting on the Pacific Ocean was a lone ship named the _Queen of Catastrophe_. On that front edge of the railing on the dock of the ship sat a man in a pure black school uniform and white hair. He was Hyoubu Kyousuke, the leader of the "terrorist" organization, PANDRA.

As he sat staring at the sea in front of him, "I wonder what my Queen is up to." He then stood up, ready to do a serial teleport to B.A.B.E.L. Headquarters.

"Where exactly do you think you're going, Major?" A stern male voice had emanated from right behind him.

"Magi…" Hyoubu turned around to see the midde-aged man with shoulder-length black hair and a black suit named Magi Shirou. "I'm just going off to see the Queen. I'll leave overseeing the repairs to you."

"Oh, no you don't." He grabbed at Hyoubu's shirt and pulled him down off of the railing onto the dock. "The destruction of the original _Queen of Catastrophe_ during the incident with U.S.E.I. was partially your fault, Major. You have to stay and oversee the repairs. Just because you're the leader does not mean that you can kick back and do whatever you want the whole time."

With that, Magi dragged Hyoubu back with him to where the repairs were taking place. Being the leader of an infamous terrorist group was not exactly meant to be easy work, after all.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

With that, Chapter 3 is now up. I have put up a chapter progress section on my profile so check that out as well. As you are noticing, the format of the A/N section is changing. While I enjoy writing those little skits I write at the end, I feel like this is probably the best way to write this section.

I am sure that most of you have noticed that the chapter titles have all changed as well. The chapters will, from now on, be titled similar to the way the chapters are titled in the _To Aru Majutsu no Index_ Light Novels.

As for the people who are wondering whether or not The Children will become a part of Touma's harem...I will flat out answer _no_.

Anyways, Chapter 4 will be coming very soon (much more quickly than this chapter did, anyways).

With that, I lay down my pen until next time. (I love this line. Gotta give Kazuma Kamachi credit for that one.)


	4. Inanity 04

Inanity 04-

Reunions and Surprises.

Boisterous_Return.

**A Certain District 7 Multilevel Overpass**

Two girls walked out of the overpass mall with satisfied expressions. "Misaka didn't think it was even possible to eat that much, says Misaka as Misaka ponders about your black hole stomach."

"That was good. I wonder why Touma never took me to places like this before."

"Myaaa~"

"You agree too. Right, Sphynx?"

"But, the manager man banned you from the restaurant, didn't he? Inquires Misaka as Misaka remembers the manager's panicked face."

"Yes…and I'm still hungry…" Index grasped at her stomach.

"Fifteen plates of food and she still wants more, notes Misaka as Misaka ponders further. Misaka is absolutely stunned at that black hole stomach of yours, says Misaka as Misaka stares at your slim figure."

The two girls had been chatting like this for a while after spending two thousand yen in total and two hours in the restaurant. As such, they were walking out to see the sun gone from the black sky coated with small white dots.

"Whoa…the sun has already set. That means…" Index made a short pause. "Dinner time! I have to get back to Touma!"

Last Order grabbed a watch in her pocket and noticed that the time was already 7:30 PM. "Misaka has to get back to the hospital too, notices Misaka as Misaka looks at the watch in her pocket."

"Hospital? Do you mean the one with the frog-faced doctor?"

"Yes replies Misaka as Misaka explains that she is a patient at that hospital."

"Well, the hospital is not too far away from Touma's dorm. How about we keep on going together for a bit more?"

"Misaka would like that, says Misaka as Misaka grabs your and drags you with her."

* * *

**Somewhere Else in District 7**

A boy with blue hair and piercings in a winter school uniform, known commonly to everyone else as Aogami Pierce, was walking near a park in District 7. Seeing as the majority of people who would be near a park at night, if any, would be Skill Outs, Aogami Pierce was able to walk comfortably in silence as there seemed to be nobody in the vicinity barring from the occasional car.

However, one of those cars suddenly pulled over near the curb behind where Aogami was walking. He did not look back and heard the car door opening behind him while two sets of footsteps came up to him. He soon felt a hand land on his shoulder.

"Anti-Skill," a gruff male voice simply said to him.

As he Aogami turned around, he could see two young male Anti-Skill officers behind him. Aogami was used to being questioned by the authorities, be it Judgement or Anti-Skill, and he had been questioned at least 30 times within this same year. In the end, though, he realized that there would be no moe within this questioning and let an aura of disappointment go over him.

* * *

**A District 7 Apartment Complex**

It was not the biggest apartment. It had a living room, a bedroom, bathroom, and a kitchen area. As such, it was all that was necessary for Minamoto to live in. It was about 7:30 P.M. when Minamoto had unpacked his clothes, set up the internet connection, and hung up Feather's birdhouse near the balcony window.

Minamoto was sitting on a cushion in front of an open laptop computer sitting on a low height table in the living room. On the screen of his laptop was an application for Anti-Skill which Yomikawa Aiho had given him before he left for the apartment. Standing next to him was a barefoot girl of about twenty years of age with long red hair and red eyes. She was wearing a white tank top, a bead necklace, and blue mini-skirt.

"Are you seriously considering the offer that track-suit woman posed?" She asked.

"Not really. The infiltration mission here is temporary, even if it is long term. Plus, being a member of Anti-Skill may get in the way of the mission and supervising the girls, Feather."

"I see…" Feather walked to and opened the balcony door before walking onto it and leaning on the railing. As she started off into the lights of the city, an expression of melancholy began to form on her face.

"Is something wrong, Feather?"

"It's nothing…."

_This is too weird. I have no memories of ever doing a mission, let alone a long-term one, in Academy City. Actually…I don't even remember a place like Academy City even existing. Could this have been a result of the Triple Boost?_

Feather clasped her face with her hand. _What the hell is going on here?_

* * *

**An Intersection in District 7**

The nun and the clone were standing at the corner of a street next to a four-way intersection. Despite the fact that it was an intersection, there were little to no cars on the street.

"Unfortunately, Misaka thinks we have to part here, noting Misaka as Misaka sees the hospital nearby."

"I see. I guess that I have to get back to Touma's—"

"INDEX!" The nun girl was interrupted by the sound of someone calling for her. She turned around to see a spiky-haired high school boy waving his hand above his head about a block away.

"Ah! It's Touma!" Index turned back to Last Order.

"Go ahead advises Misaka as Misaka smiles at you. He is calling for you after all, points out Misaka as Misaka looks at the background."

"He is." Index started to walk away and turned around to wave. "Bye Last Order! I had a lot of fun today!"

"Let's do this again sometime soon, Index! Shouts Misaka as Misaka waves back."

Index continued to run down the road until she stopped right in front of Touma.

"Touma!"

"Welcome back. I see you've made a new friend, Index."

"Yes I did. By the way…what's for dinner?"

"That depends. How much of that money did you use up?"

Last Order stood at the corner watching the two as they left talking about dinner. "What a nice family, observes Misaka as Misaka gets ready to—OW!" She turned behind her to see a white-haired, red-eyed boy with a choker and cane behind her.

"WHAT WAS THAT FOR!? ASKS MISAKA AS MISAKA POUTS AND FLAILS AROUND HER ARMS!"

"Shut it, you damn brat. I spent a good three or so hours looking for you."

"So, you were worried about Misaka, Accelerator? Asks Misaka as Misaka lets a nice grin form on her face."

"Shut it." Accelerator looked away for a second. "I see you made a new friend, Last Order."

"Her name is Index, says Misaka as Misaka talks about her friend. Would you like to hear more about her? Inquires Misaka as Misaka looks into your face?"

"You can talk as much as you want as soon as we get back to the hospital, okay?"

"Alright, acquiesces Misaka as Misaka grabs your hand and starts dragging you back to the hospital."

"Hey! Calm down, brat!" Accelerator shouted to the little girl running with his hand in hers to no avail.

_Oh well. At least she is happy._ At that moment, anyone who saw Accelerator's face would have sworn that he was giving a warm smile.

* * *

**A Café in the School Garden**

"My Queen, I think that's enough. We should really be heading back to the dorms before the curfew starts." A girl with purple-shaded hair and multiple ringlet curls in a Tokiwadai uniform spoke silently to a blonde with stars in her eyes and an over-pronounced bust in a Tokiwadai uniform, known as Shokuhou Misaki. "Besides…you shouldn't eat so many sweets. You're going to destroy you figure." She picked up the plate with the éclair that the blonde was going to eat and moved it away.

"You're no fun at all." Misaki pouted.

"By the way, did you hear that Misaka-sama was seen with the new transfer students?" One of the more forgettable girls of the Queen's faction asked.

"She was, huh?" Misaki replied. "She may act like a lone wolf, but she's doing a great job making more and more allies. Well, it's not like she plans to attack our faction or anything."

"Even so…those transfer students seemed like interesting people," Another faction girl retorted. "It would be nice to bring them into our faction. Maybe you can force them in before Misaka-sama takes them in, my Queen."

"I know I said that Misaka-san is amassing allies, but that does not mean that she is forming a faction of her own. It would not be like her to do something about it so just leave it alone. Besides, I'm not into forcing other people into doing things they don't necessarily want to."

"Is that last statement of yours supposed to be your idea of a joke, my Queen?" The ringlet girl asked.

"Who knows?"

The ringlet girl sighed before looking at the clock. "Ahh! That's the last time I'm letting you distract me, my Queen! We're going back to the dorms _now_." She and the other girls grabbed Misaki by her glove covered arms and picked her up.

"I don't want to go yet!" Misaki flailed in a faux-childish manner as the girls went to the counter to pay for the food and leave.

* * *

**A Vending Machine in a District 13 Research Facility**

"…and so another set of specimens goes completely out of my jurisdiction." A woman in a cheap suit and a lab coat muttered to herself with a golden retriever sitting nearby.

"What are you talking about?" A voice of a male in his prime emanated through the area. "You already have too many things falling under your jurisdiction."

The male voice was coming from the dog who was sticking its tongue out while it spoke.

"Like what?"

"You have Agitate Halation to worry about. There's also the matter of AIM Stalker. You have plenty on your plate."

"But Yakumi-san has more influence over the Agitate Halation Project and ITEM's middleman is doing all of the fun stuff with AIM Stalker."

"Honestly, that is your fault. You were the one who implanted your intellectual curiosity into that woman."

"And that's why I get along so well with her."

The golden retriever sighed. "In the end, it's just an issue of motivation with you, Yuiitsu. I don't think adding another project would fix that."

"Hey, it's in my nature as a Kihara."

"I assume you mean the desire for more projects and specimens. I'm sure you know that lack of motivation is very unbecoming of a Kihara like you or I.

"Just work with what you have right now. After all, the reason you let those projects fall into your lap was because the Kihara in you found them interesting."

"I guess so…"

* * *

**A Private VIP Salon in District 3**

Within District 3 stood a high-rise building which was full of leisure facilities for high grade users. Within this high-rise was a VIP Salon with multiple large 3LDK size rooms which could be reserved on an annual basis by certain members.

Four girls were sitting in one of these spacious rooms on two parallel couches facing each other. Their names were Frenda Seivelun, Takitsubo Rikou, Kinuhata Saiai, and Mugino Shizuri. These four girls made up the underground Academy City organization known and feared as ITEM. At the center on the table in front of them was a single tablet which had the words "VOICE ONLY" displaying on its screen in English.

"Spies, you say?" Mugino asked.

"That sounds super boring."

"In the end, you are just giving us some stupid advanced notice."

The fourth girl, Takitsubo, did not reply. Despite the fact that her eyes were wide open, it seemed like she was fast asleep.

"Well, the higher ups discovered them pretty quickly. It's pretty different from that time a spy entered Academy City and was able to avoid us by bringing in a completely unrelated normal person with him. Unlike the current case, the spy eventually became a useful double agent working for Academy City. With respect to the current spies, at this point, we're keeping a watch on them but if they act in any way that is deemed harmful to Academy City, they will order ITEM to take action."

"Why ITEM? You could easily send the Aleister's dogs, MEMBER, or another organization with a Level 5 like SCHOOL."

"Unfortunately, SCHOOL is not exactly the first organization we would turn to at a time like this and I have my doubts that MEMBER is exactly cut out for this type of mission since we don't want to use the Professor's Mimosa."

"So, you are just super making us wait and see."

"In the end, you could have just waited until they made the move to let us know just like what happened with the mission to guard those facilities back on August 19th instead of letting us know that the old guys on the Board of Directors are just planning to wait and watch."

Takitsubo's head then tilted and fell onto her shoulder.

"If that is it, I'm hanging up now." An annoyed Mugino chimed in before closing the app on the tablet.

On the other side of the now disconnected call, a woman could be heard saying, "Those girls are going to drive me insane one day."

* * *

**Tokiwadai Interior Dormitory Room 108**

After spending the rest of the day with Mikoto in District 7 and the School Garden, the girls split up and returned to their respective dormitories barely in time for the curfew.

After cleaning up, the three of them sat in front of a laptop with a webcam on.

"All in all, it was pretty fun." Kaoru concluded.

"I'm glad to hear that." Minamoto replied from the opposite side of the webcam.

"By the way, we ran into your target earlier," Shiho said.

"Yeah, he honestly did not seem like too bad of a person," Aoi followed up.

"Although…Shiho is pretty bitter about him for some reason," Kaoru said.

"I actually got the same impression," Minamoto said. "Well, at least from being his teacher for only one day so far. But first impressions can be deceptive. That being said…" He gave a short pause.

"Did I not order you to stay away from my target?"

"You did, but—"

"Look. I'm not angry with you. I'm worried. We're in enemy territory right now so we have to be a bit more careful with how we act since we're already enough danger as is."

"Then why are you letting us move about freely, then, Minamoto-han?"

"The first reason is to keep up the ruse that you are just normal middle school students. The second is that I want you guys to have at least some fun on this mission. We are going to be here for a while, after all. After all, it's not like this mission has a definite end date."

"This is starting to sound a lot more like a paid vacation than a mission, Minamoto."

"I guess you three could think of it that way. It's not like we're active at the moment."

"By the Minamoto-han, where is Feather? I don't see her in the birdhouse."

"At the moment, she is standing on the balcony thinking about something. I get the feeling that it's something important but she does not exactly seem to be willing to talk about it."

A short silence stayed in that room before Minamoto began to speak again.

"Now that that is out of the way, let me get to the more pressing matter. Your first mission will start in two days on September 30th. That mission will be…"

**INANITY END**

* * *

**Author's Note: **What is that? END!? No...don't worry about it. The story is not over yet. This is just the end of the Inanity Arc. The next chapter will mark the beginning of the Academy City Invasion Arc Children Side.

For those of you who read the light novels, try and see if you can find a more hidden (not the obvious one) reference to the most recent volume.

At this point, I would like to mention that I will not be uploading Chapter 5 for a few months mainly because I have to prepare for MCATs over the Summer. So, I probably won't update until early October at the earliest.

With that, I lay down my pen until next time.


End file.
